Chapter 5 - THE PUNISHMENT WAS NEVER ABOUT THE AFFAIR
Susan read every letter.
Michael’s earliest pages were frantic and tender. He wrote about Samuel’s dark hair, though the baby had barely any. He described holding the tiny bundle once because the bereavement nurse said refusing might become a regret he could not repair.
Then the letters changed.
By 2009, grief had hardened into accusation.
Your mother chose another man, then chose not to wake up.
By 2012, he wrote less about Susan’s affair and more about the night of the overdose.
I keep thinking that if she had wanted to live, you might have lived too.
That was the major lie beneath their marriage.
Michael had not spent eighteen years merely punishing Susan for infidelity. He had blamed her for Samuel’s death, even though the medical report stated the fetal demise likely began before the overdose. The sedatives had endangered Susan, but there was no evidence they had caused the loss.
He had read that report. A copy was folded beneath the letters.
He knew the doctors could not blame her.
He had chosen to do it anyway.
Susan found Michael sitting at the kitchen table when she returned. The faded bracelet rested in front of him. This time, he did not hide it.
It read BABY BOY MILLER.
“You knew the medical report cleared me,” she said.
Michael looked older than he had that morning.
“I knew they couldn’t prove what caused it.”
“That’s not the same thing.”
“No.”
“You let me believe your cruelty was the price of the affair. You watched me apologize for eighteen years while you knew there was another grave underneath all of it.”
His eyes filled, but Susan felt no urge to comfort him.
“I couldn’t forgive you,” he said. “And I couldn’t leave Jake with a mother who might try again. So I stayed.”
“You stayed close enough to punish me.”
“I stayed because part of me still loved you.”
Susan placed copies of the letters, the medical report, and the forged form on the table.
“I’m filing a complaint with the hospital. I’m also speaking to an attorney about the forged record.”
Michael stared at the documents.
Susan continued, “Jake will be here tomorrow. You’re going to tell him the truth yourself.”
“And if I don’t?”
May you like
She removed her wedding ring and set it beside the bracelet.
“Then the next conversation we have will be through lawyers.”
