Chapter 14 - Colby's Last Chance to Be a Father
Colby met Bernadette outside the courthouse before the review hearing.
Early October wind pushed dry leaves along the sidewalk.
He looked tired enough that for one dangerous second Bernadette saw the little boy he had once been.
“Mom.”
She stopped.
“I need you to tell them I was under pressure.”
“You were.”
His face lifted slightly.
“Then tell them.”
“I already did.”
Relief flashed across his face.
Bernadette continued.
“I also told them pressure doesn't make what you did acceptable.”
The relief disappeared.
“You'd really let them take my son away?”
“They didn't take him. Your choices changed where he could safely live.”
Colby looked toward the courthouse doors.
“I signed that donor form because Shana wanted a baby.”
“The counseling record says otherwise.”
He looked at her sharply.
Bernadette watched him understand.
“You read it.”
“Yes.”
“Private medical records.”
“Shana provided records relevant to the case.”
Colby laughed without humor.
“So now everybody gets to know the most humiliating thing that ever happened to me.”
Bernadette finally saw the center of it.
“Colby, infertility happened to you. Milo didn't.”
He looked away.
She stepped closer.
“You've spent years treating him like evidence of something taken from you. But you chose him before he existed. You chose to be his father. Then, when you felt threatened, you punished him for the choice you made.”
Colby's eyes reddened.
“I loved him.”
“I know.”
That answer seemed to hurt him.
Bernadette opened the courthouse door.
“If you want any chance of being in his life someday, stop using love as your defense.”
Inside, Colby's attorney offered him the written treatment agreement.
Colby read it.
The section requiring acknowledgment of physical abuse was three lines long.
He held the pen.
Shana sat across the aisle.
Bernadette did not look at him again.
After nearly a minute, Colby put the pen down.
“I won't sign something that calls me an abuser.”
His attorney whispered to him.
May you like
Colby shook his head.
The judge resumed the hearing.
