Chapter 14 - CAITLYN ASKED MADISON ONE QUESTIONNearly a year after the locked-room incident, Caitlyn asked:
“Does Madison still hate me?”
“No.”
“How do you know?”
“She told me.”
“Do you believe her?”
“Yes.”
Caitlyn thought.
“Do I have to?”
“No.”
She nodded.
Then:
“I want to talk to her.”
We arranged it with Caitlyn’s therapist.
Short.
Neutral place.
Madison entered looking terrified.
Good.
Not because I wanted her suffering.
Because fear sometimes indicates a person finally understands stakes.
Caitlyn sat beside me.
Madison said:
“Hi.”
“Hi.”
Then silence.
Madison began:
“I’m sorry I—”
Caitlyn interrupted.
“Why did you laugh?”
Madison froze.
“What?”
“When I was behind the door.”
That was the question.
Not money.
Not Anna.
Not the caregiver stipend.
The laugh.
Madison started crying.
“Because I wanted you scared.”
Caitlyn stared.
“Why?”
“Because when you're scared, you stop arguing.”
My hands tightened.
I said nothing.
Madison continued.
“And because Mom liked when I could handle you.”
There.
Golden child reward.
“You liked being the good daughter,” Caitlyn said.
Madison nodded.
“Yes.”
“So I had to be bad?”
Madison covered her mouth.
“Yes.”
Caitlyn looked at the floor.
Then asked:
“Was I?”
“No.”
Immediate.
“No, Caitlyn.”
“Ever?”
“You were annoying sometimes.”
I almost objected.
Then Caitlyn laughed.
A real laugh.
“I know.”
The tension broke for half a second.
Then Madison said:
“But you weren't bad. I needed you to be the difficult one so Mom wouldn't be mad at me.”
Caitlyn absorbed that.
She did not forgive her.
No hug.
No dramatic reconciliation.
She said:
“I don't want you babysitting me ever.”
Madison almost smiled through tears.
“Fair.”
Then:
“Can I see you at Christmas?”
Caitlyn looked at me.
I answered:
“Your choice.”
She thought.
May you like
“Maybe.”
That was enough.
