Chapter 6 - The Price of Finally Looking
Hannah had not logged into their primary joint account in almost four months.
Derek handled the bills.
At least that was what she had told herself.
The truth was less flattering.
Every time she questioned money, Derek became sarcastic.
So eventually she stopped asking.
Now she downloaded twelve months of statements.
The first thing she noticed was not missing money.
It was movement.
Small transfers from their savings account into checking.
Then larger transfers.
Eight hundred dollars.
Fifteen hundred.
Three thousand.
Whenever Hannah asked why their savings balance seemed lower, Derek blamed the nursery renovation, insurance deductibles or increased grocery costs.
The statements told a different story.
More than twenty-seven thousand dollars had disappeared.
Some transfers ended in an account Hannah did not recognize.
She called the bank.
Because she was a joint owner, a representative could explain transactions involving their shared accounts but not disclose private details of Derek’s separate account.
That was enough.
The money had been transferred at Derek’s direction.
Hannah sat on Thomas’s guest-room bed after discharge with Eli asleep beside her in a bassinet.
Twenty-seven thousand dollars.
Months of being told she was expensive.
Lazy.
A burden.
Meanwhile Derek had been draining their savings.
Thomas stood in the doorway.
“How much?”
“Enough.”
She looked at him.
“Did you know he was having financial problems?”
“I knew he asked for an advance twice.”
“You said no?”
“The second time.”
Hannah nodded slowly.
Another puzzle piece.
The worse Derek’s finances became, the more contemptuous he became toward her pregnancy.
He complained she slept too much.
Ate too much.
Needed too much.
But the pregnancy had not created his panic.
It had created someone he could blame for it.
That realization hurt differently from the slap.
The slap had lasted a second.
The contempt had lasted months.
Thomas asked, “What are you going to do?”
“I don’t know yet.”
That night Derek emailed.
Please stop letting your father poison you against me.
Hannah read farther.
I lost my temper. I’m sorry.
You hit me too.
We both did things we regret.
Then:
Bring Eli home. We need to be a family.
Hannah stared at the phrase.
Bring Eli home.
Not Come home.
Not I miss you.
Bring Eli.
She forwarded the email to the attorney a domestic-violence advocate had recommended.
Then she opened a new checking account in her name only and changed the direct deposit for her maternity benefits.
For the first time in six years, Derek could no longer see every dollar she had.
At 11:08 p.m., another email arrived.
We need to talk before your father tells you something that destroys this family.
Hannah read it twice.
May you like
Then she realized something.
Derek still believed Thomas had not told her everything.
